Last week I had my hair cut at a salon down the street from my house. I was just talking it up with the girl who was doing my hair and she told me that the blonde girl that works there is on Beauty and the Geek. I thought this was hilarious because she did my hair at previous visits. (no wonder she hooked me up) lol Its just a little surreal, not in a wow she’s famous lol, nope but more in a that’s weird and interesting. That’s how I like my life weird and interesting. Life hasn’t let up this theme anytime soon. Lol

My biggest revelation this year is that everything really means nothing, and I don’t mean this in a negative way at all. It seems that soo many people do things without even noticing how it will hurt or affect others. I used to be that person who got hurt but no longer.

I got tested this past weekend and Thank God, I wasn’t affected like I used to be in the past. I am happy and content!

Keep on, persevere, until the day breaks, and shadows flee away.

I recently saw the most interesting, most intriguing documentary this season. The documentary was simply about Sesame Street. So yes I say simply because I mean gosh it's Sesame Street but then it went complicated and interesting and... yes intriguing lol. It was centered around how Sesame Street could help war torn countries by helping restructure the children's mind. For example the Bosnian/Serbian battle, the team from Sesame Street wanted to help the Bosnian/Serbian issue by showing the children from both sides each others culture, by familiarizing these children with each other so they can become more understanding of each other. The people helping to bring Sesame Street to different countries around the world were so passionate and focused on making sure it makes a difference for everyone. I truly felt their passion and intensity.

A great man once told me (Ravi Star) that his mother does workshops on Racism and the biggest thing that kept racism going was segregation. Segregation, hmm makes me think of another war torn place, Israel.

I hurried through this I apologize because I am leaving out some beautiful things that were expressed in this documentary!

I love you all and know I understand and love all of you with all your differences, religion or otherwise!

I've noticed, lately how detached I have been! It feels sooo great!

It has actually been a long road to get to this place but now that I am here, I am never going to look back! : )

Love it!

Do you feel my energy?

Do you feel my heart beat faster when you are next to me?

Do you feel how much I care for you?

Do you feel the feelings, the feelings that will not come out of my mouth but are coming out of every inch of my body!

I can not, will not share that but I will share my energy, so feel that!

and know I care, I could love but will not, not now!

For now, feel that!

Do you feel that?

I've always known there was an artist within but because of the path my life has been going I have gone a completely different route than I expected (not a bad route mind you). There was actually a time where I was considering going to Columbia to explore what I would be great at. There's this love for music and art that makes my body quiver. There are soo many sides of me exuding itself through energy and excitement! The self expression that lives within has been inhibited. I was talking to some close friends recently, Lau and Jinous. We were talking about how boring it is to have a desk job. I can bare a lot of things because my tolerance for discomfort is high.

I love being a professional and being diligent about my work but I get in these quiet bouts and it scares me cuz it holds me back, hides me even. I want to say what my heart longs to say, I want to dance my heart out, be moved, inspired and even be a little vulnerable, owa scary! : )

I don't regret anything or any choice I have made. I'm actually really excited about my future! : )

I got a glimpse of real amazing self expression while living in the bowler house. Lau and I made music, explored indi films, cried, laughed, and made our hearts smile : )! IT WAS AMAZING!

On another topic, LOVE! I am getting closer and closer to compatibility and it feels great!

Work has been sooo interesting lately!

You'd be very surprised at the things that go on!

I would say more but its confidential lol.

I can say that I am in the process of receiving a certificate in Project Management. I'm really excited about this!

HAPPY DAY AFTER RIDVAN EVERYBODY!!! : ) WOOHOO, yesterday was awesome. I miss the House of Worship. I'm really glad I went! The HOW gives me sooo much energy, life, love and reminds me how much I love the faith!

I'm thinking of moving up there for the summer. Ahhaa down the street from the HOW, that would be my dream!

Late night walks to the How oowa yeahhhh!!! God Willing this works out!

I do this and it sucks. I want to just live and experience life but I am such an aggressive person that if I don't get something then I can't help but wonder why? What went wrong and so on. Being aggressive has gotten me most of the things have wanted but dam when I don't, my mind starts running with the why?

Any suggestion on how to overcome this? Hmmm? : )